Anti social , Low-self esteem, Highly unmotivation , DUN CARE ..

I feel that I am always a negative person.
Some reflection on myself for recent events.

Found out that I am more and more anti social , I dont wish to go any where, just trap myself in my little world, my only friend is my "notes" and programming assignment.

I dont barely care anyone feeling and look down upon myself all the time. Dont really aware of what is happening to the surrounding.

Just have the feeling of DUN CARE after 4 years studying in Singapore.
Everyone rush me and ask me to look for my job early, I just dun feel like doing it , forcing myself to do it . But the fact is I need to do IT.

Just keep on struggling and doubting myself.
Some good things to reflect on, recently I found out that if I remain calm and relax, I can understand all the "notes" in a few hours rather than I spend whole day looking at the notes but nothing go inside my brain for process.

What should I do?

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Looking at his ownself .. reflecting

This post is meant to reflect on myself . Lately, I keep reflecting on my appearance.
It seems like I look fking ugly and sohai with all my way of representing myself.

Personally , I will like changing into a smarter and nice looking guy. A better way of presenting myself even right before I speak and stuff.

Still, I need to find a way to learn to do that. Currently, Just feel tired busy with all the work, mayb I allocated too much time for myself to relax compare to old times during form5-6 .

Should I change my strategy ? This is what I have been thinking.
I look at ppl they all look so smart yet I am like ...

Should I change ? I must learn to be Haw .. cant stand in one place for long .. Just now I need to take the action ? Am I too lazy to do so ? Afraid of the changes ? Scared spend money ? Stingy ?

No one knows , I can answer myself , Mayb I know the answer but cannot accept..

So contradicting...

Looking at the clock , I shall go for make-up lecture le. NUS@SOC - a place we never get to rest.
Unlike others , for socians sohai still need to work like sohai for just 5% work and one of my team member is like .. dun wan mention la .. too tired to scold and blame anyone.

The end. ...

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Sniffy , Scurry , Hem and Haw ?

Lately , I read this book titled " Who moved my cheese " .
I found out that some how the author pointed out me being one of the character in this.
No doubt, I am Haw . The tiny little man always afraid of changes.

Still hoping that there is no changes in my normal life, my fear of changes.

Well , now i can associate the idea with my life first , followed by my future working job.
I should learn how to be Haw. Not stopping in only single phase but adopt to the changes that
take place, no matter changes in terms of life , job or relationship.

Sniffy and Scurry is a good role model , looking for new direction as thing changes . Conquer the FEAR of Change !

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Getting myself to move

I am easily distracted with stuff. My house mate play game and this kinda distract me.
I need to find a way so I can focus my self towards study.
I am not blaming my friends for playing games in front me, just my own problem.

I am glad with my darling love and care. Thank you mylove =)

Some time, things come in my mind how am i going to pay my debt after i graduated.
The economic crisis really is a disaster... Well , we shall see.

Met an old friend who came back from NOC . He told me computer engineer is being treated well in European countries. Should I give myself a try there ? ( But my result "so-so" only =( )

Hope I am determined enough to start myself learning to code in PHP.

Love darling always . Muacks =)

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New Semester

Here come my final year final semester in NUS

Life will be as usual. The school is full with students rushing here and there.
I attended a resume talk with my darling , it gives me some new idea on my "noob" resume . LOL !

Went to the office of undergraduate studies in SOC , all keep reject my appeal . WTH !
Dont tell me I need to take a 4MC module just because I am lacking only 1 single mc to do my FFG.

24 mc is a heavy workload man .

Well, later I will be going swimming with my JH liao. Hope my email for the appeal to Dr. Chan will give me good news instead of bad ones....

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